let see, i haven't gone to work in the last one whole week... and it has been a "sleep, eat, sleep, eat, sleep, watch 24, sew shoes, paint shoes, sleep." routinue for me. haha quite enjoyable i must say! esp the part where i can wake up at 2 everday. (:

had the regional picnic on sat, pretty fun, upload pictures sooon. haha great job guys!

and so we've been singing "i stand" quite a fair bit.. but it struck me hard on sat bout standing up for God. yup, to be honest, its tough. it requires the process of dying to self and that is something tt no one'll find easy im sure. it involves risking how ppl might view me, yea, the acceptance and popularity issue. not tt its a big one with me... but i won't deny that there exists a desire to be accepted by the ppl around me. in fact, i feel that it increases with age. and im ageing. FAST. (arghhh:/) even in my workplace, back then in my school life, making a stand for God was more than making statements and singing songs.

after i turned 18, the peer pressure started to sip in a lil more. i mean, 18=legality. to clubs, drinks and all that stuff. as much as i never thot i would be affected, i was. i still am praying for God to guard my heart. but yea, im glad i made a stand in this area. and i wanna continue to, i really do. i couldnt ahve done it with my own strength, its God.

everytime i battled with the thot of compromising, God would show me the very same page in my study bible. lol and its really freaky. the heading goes like that "How different would you have made your choice if you knew Jesus was right at the party?" haha God is so quick! haha. there was this other time whr i was abt to give in, and He smacked me hard in the head. yes, the Matthew 7:21 verse. its a taboo verse. hahahah but i thot i needed a whack in the head at tht point of time. and of course almost every other time i think of it, the verse in Romans 12 something.oops.(im at work so need to be verifed) the one bout us not to be conformed to the world but to transformed to be like christ? ya. another thing that awakens me is the eternal perspective. how am i gonna say i love Him when i am not willing to make a stand for Him when i see Him face to face.

okay i know now im making God sound like he's soo against parties. in actual fact, Jesus's life was a life of a party! we party and celebrate cos we have an eternal hope in christ that never fails! ppl get depressed and feel empty even after a great night at the club. ppl feel the void, misery and the hopelessness in their situations after the numbing effect of the alcohol dies off. ppl who get into trash relationships and think tt they've found someone who loved them truly, but find themselves lonely and unaccepted at some point. ppl who work so hard to be like someone they adore or wished to be like, but get themselves so drained out and lose themselves in the process. but my hope in Jesus never dies, He never fails me, He'll never leave me, and the best thing is i don't have to live a day sad, lonely, hopeless. yea, the feeling's better than anythin the world offers. the world will fade away, popularity will, friends come and go, i'll die one day and so will you. soooo now, who cares bout what the world thinks?! haha. (:

i figured that my post wouldnt be very well liked or comfortable to hear, but its so so true.

you know what im feeling soo happy tt i finally got it down here.
im not here to show how "devoted" or how perfect my life is, but i think confessing it relieves a big part of me. (:
im so happy; i can't describes this feeling!
God you are the BEST! <3