After living 21 years of my life, it is no surprise to me that life is never without pain or sorrow. My positivism lasted me what, one day? For once I felt free, I felt really happy from within. But many things happened yesterday and ha, everything crumbled. Well, life presents so many ways to deal with pain and sorrow. The temptation to escape by fighting, reasoning, forgetting, by drowning the trouble with activity, by shutting oneself out from the world, by surrendering to defeat and sullen resentment always seems too real to evade. Yet, what is peace? I found this on a friend's blog last night and it helped me understand:

He said, "I will forget the dying faces;
The empty places,
They shall be filled again.
O voices moaning deep within me, cease."
But vain the word, vain, vain;
Not in forgetting lieth peace.

He said, "I will crowd action upon action,
The strife of faction
Shall stir me and sustain;
O tears that drown the fire of manhood, cease."
But vain, the word, vain, vain:
Not in endeavour lieth peace.

He said, "I will withdraw me and be quiet,
Why meddle in life's riot?
Shut be my door to pain.
Desire, thou dost befool me, thou shalt cease."
But vain the word, vain, vain:
Not in aloofness lieth peace.

He said, "I will submit, I am defeated.
God hath depleted
My life of its rich gain.
O futile murmurings, why will ye not cease?"
But vain the word, vain, vain:
Not in submission lieth peace.

He said, "I will accept the breaking sorrow
Which God tomorrow
Will to His son explain."
Then did the turmoil deep within him cease.
Not vain the word, not vain:
For in Acceptance lieth peace.

- Amy Carmichael

Acceptance that You are Sovereign and Just. Acceptance of the fact that You are bigger than the biggest impossibilities. Acceptance of the fact that before I utter a word, You already know. Acceptance that even though I'm scared to bits about the future, You will walk beside me and guide me. Acceptance of that fact that You alone, are always faithful and is always there for me, even if I don't feel it all the time.

I don't need positivism, what I need is Peace.