after one week of pain and anguish, im just here to announce tt im not dead. yet.
examinations are seriously dumb. i know, "oh its a gauge to see where you stand in your studies and just to see how much you've learnt."
but why would i wanna know? i mean i actually already do know where i stand and your stinkingly difficult papers are not helping me feel less demoralized.
i can't believe im saying this, i think im gonna fail math! yeah.
and it was lyke the only thing i actually studied for? my gosh.

this is what happened during paper one:
Q1. blah blah blah blah blah blah.
mind: huh? what the? skip.

Q2. BLAH blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah?
mind: okay i think i can do this, lets try.....................or not.

Q3:bl=ah. prove.
mind:what's tt? what has the LHS gotta do with the right? okay nvm, skip.

Q4:blah blah blah blah,( YOU'RE SO DEAD) blah blah. hence blah blah blah.
mind: maybe im too nervous, i cant do this either. alright, calm down esther. CALM DOWN. next.

Q5: #@$^*(dfjh#2BH
mind:fine, im stupid. :X

i was close to tears alright! but i'll never cry for exams la. i think. heh

and so i had paper two yesterday:
mind: god, pleaaaase help me. i really do need your help. im lyke so dead without you. so please! amen.
part a
Q1: HUH.
Q2:HUH.
Q3:THIS IS NOT HAPPENING AGAIN!?
Q4:jesus... help...
Q5:AIYA WE'LL GO TO STATISTICS.
part b
Q8: blah blah blahblah blah , blah blah blah?
this time, i whined audibly: "huhhhhhhhhh! GOD! PLEASE HELP ME."
Q8 to end: seems lyke my prayers got thru!:D
somehow it felt lyke god was helping me complete the paper. awesome. :D

i feel pretty bad for all my papers. but oh well, i thank god its prelims and nt "A"s.
ive got one more chance right? ive got lots of work to do. too lil time, so much to do.
advice: if you want to have a life, pleeeease. dont come to a jc. you'll either be a mugging machine,
or in my case, die at the second year after slacking for all your jc life, and become a overworked mugging machine.

went for prata near jidi's place ystdae night.
hullo!? i ate prataS at 11 plus, how sinful tt is.
joel's leaving for brunei tonight and im wishing him the best!
he's really dragging it i know, but hey! we're rooting for you!

it has been a week tt i can say tt i have tasted and see, tt god is good.
faithful, even when i am not.